Standing in front of the permanent secretary and a roomful of executives, I nervously cleared my throat. It was October 2018 and I was in the middle of giving a big presentation on progressing racial equality in the department, but instead, I anxiously excused myself saying: ‘I have to go do the nursery run.’.
![[Elliot Rae - We need to use the term 'working dads']](https://metro.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2024/11/SEI_229570400-0a13-e1731589136881.jpg?quality=90&strip=all&w=646)
No one leaves those kinds of meetings early. But, as I was due to be talking just before the exact time that I had to leave, I had no choice. Though none of the executives expressed any disappointment or frustration at my sudden departure – probably helped by the fact that I was a middle manager at the time – they were quite clearly surprised and I felt bad for bailing.
![[Elliot Rae - We need to use the term 'working dads']](https://metro.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2024/11/SEI_229570338-6b88-e1731595457392.jpg?quality=90&strip=all&w=646)
Deep down I knew I’d done everything in my power to avoid this awkwardness: I’d told my PA I needed to leave at 3pm to pick up my daughter from nursery days earlier, so it wasn’t my fault that the message hadn’t been passed on. Still, I couldn’t help but think about other dads in my position. What if they weren’t as privileged as I was? What if their employer wasn’t as understanding?.
![[Elliot Rae - We need to use the term 'working dads']](https://metro.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2024/11/SEI_229570388-3e64-e1734964784897.jpg?quality=90&strip=all&w=646)
That’s when it hit me. We never use the phrase ‘working dads’ like we do ‘working mums’, but we really should. That way we can help men to thrive in their careers and allow them to be the caring fathers that they want to be. When my wife and I learned we were to become parents in January 2015, we were absolutely over the moon.
![[Elliot Rae - We need to use the term 'working dads']](https://metro.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2024/11/SEI_229570346-5f59.jpg?quality=90&strip=all&w=646)
