I try to explain that this was not only the first game to ever feature a realistic-looking Bean, but also the first where you had a working telescopic sniper rifle, the first I can remember that not only featured headshot kills, but goons that reacted properly to being shot.
Maybe Jeff Bezos will finally decide he wants to do some good for the world and give us a sequel to the greatest multiplayer game of the 90s.
“Can you shoot hats off people in Halo, son?” I scream, not realising he had gone back to college, which is a pity, because I hadn’t even told him there was a multiplayer mode where you could run around slapping each other.
We won’t get a GoldenEye sequel because the big game publishers keep closing all their studios and firing their staff after forcing them to work on ill-advised Fortnite or Overwatch knockoffs for years.
Not content with giving us big head mode, it also had paintball mode, which people exclusively used to draw penises on the walls, because this was the 90s.
