McAndrew says there is evidence that gossip has greater currency for women than it does for men, and that women are more likely to use it aggressively – to ostracise people from social groups or get an advantage on rivals.
I can’t tell you how many times people will say to me, ‘I don’t gossip’,” he says, explaining that many think of it as “something other people do” while they are merely “expressing concern” or sharing important information.
“It might be seen as negative, nasty gossip – but it’s actually serving to protect.” Similarly, gossip can highlight workplace inequity, such as if one person is being paid much more than another in the same role.
Less effective gossipers are either careless, sharing “everything that they know, to anyone who will listen” with no mind to their audience, or the potential risks and consequences – or are obviously self-serving, “talking badly about other people so that they can get ahead”, says McAndrew.
Maria Kakarika, an associate professor at Durham University Business School, recommends practising “positive gossip” – either complimenting people behind their backs or recounting their good deeds.
