Christmas is a pressure cooker, whether you are hosting or visiting family, and that intensity can often reveal a great deal about your relationship. It’s the time of year when you see (or give) strong signals that something is wrong. The problem may be with your partner – or it may be with you.
Spot any of the red flags below and your relationship may be heading into stormy waters.. It’s the time of year when you see strong signals that something is wrong in your relationship. He keeps his work party a secret. It’s perfectly OK to not want to go as his plus-one and it’s not always healthy for couples to be together all the time.
But if he’s hiding his office Christmas party from you, that’s a red flag. You have to ask yourself, why doesn’t he even want to consider inviting you?. He shows up, without really showing up. It’s OK to accept that he may not love your family and might not be thrilled about spending his Christmas holiday with them.
But if he agrees to go, is he going along to get along? Or is he sullen, sitting in the corner on his phone, silently telling everyone that he has checked out. He doesn’t have to be everyone’s best friend, but he does need to connect to your world.
He’s got a Christmas crisis at work – again. Usually people can find a way to ringfence time with the family. If he can’t, he may be exaggerating or inventing work issues to get him out of celebrations. Is it a pattern? If there’s always a crisis at this time of year that takes the focus off the festivities, you need to talk about it.