A MUM has been torn apart online for defending her husband's decision to cheat on their marriage. Joy Harrington called the infidelity a "beautiful gift" and claimed it allowed her to "heal things" she "probably wouldn't have otherwise.". But trolls were left unimpressed and branded her "embarrassing" for forgiving him and called her message "incredibly harmful.". In her caption, Joy she admitted her opinion was "not true of every cheater or every cheating incident.".
She said there are "always exceptions" and that her experience comes with a "big caveat". But she insisted that the phrase "once a cheater, always a cheater" is "false" and said after her husband's betrayal, their relationship came back "even stronger.". Joy said cheating isn't always attributed to attraction to other people, the quality of a couple's sex life or even the relationship itself. Instead, she says it's "more about an unhealthy coping mechanism" or "trauma response.".
She claims it doesn't mean your relationship has to end if one of you is disloyal, you just need to understand the root cause of the issue. And the wronged wife says she is actually thankful that her husband strayed from their marriage, as it gave her the chance to examine "unhealthy patterns" that stem from "c****y wounds" and "beliefs that you don’t need to keep carrying.". She said her experience led her to discover "resentment that was there since childhood" and finally find the freedom to let go of her "wounds.".
Having made the decision to forgive her partner, Joy claims their relationship is perfectly healthy again. Her loved-up video showed clips of the couple kissing, hugging and dancing together in what looks like the happiest of relationships. But viewers in the comments were far from convinced. One user said: "I truly feel sorry for anyone who takes advice from you.". While someone else joined in: "This is embarrassing, know your worth.".
Check his phone. You won’t be surprised. Another person blamed Joy for spreading misinformation: "Saying the trauma of betrayal is a “gift” is incredibly harmful to anyone who has been cheated on, this is egregious.". While someone else was left feeling queasy from her post: "I’m sick to my stomach just reading this.". Baby, please snap out of this delusion. And another person chimed in: "I get you’re trying to make the best out of being dealt a bad hand, but this is textbook gaslighting.
"Cheating is the most unloving, disrespectful, and cruel thing we could do to someone we pretend to love. And I mean pretend. People do not cheat on people they love.". Private Investigator Aaron Bond from BondRees revealed four warning signs your partner might be cheating. They start to take their phone everywhere with them. In close relationships, it's normal to know each other's passwords and use each other's phones, if their phone habits change then they may be hiding something.
Aaron says: "If your partner starts changing their passwords, starts taking their phone everywhere with them, even around the house or they become defensive when you ask to use their phone it could be a sign of them not being faithful.". "You should also look at how they place their phone down when not in use. If they face the phone with the screen facing down, then they could be hiding something.". They start telling you less about their day.
When partners cheat they can start to avoid you, this could be down to them feeling guilty or because it makes it easier for them to lie to you. "If you feel like your partner has suddenly begun to avoid you and they don't want to do things with you any more or they stop telling you about their day then this is another red flag.". "Partners often avoid their spouses or tell them less about their day because cheating can be tough, remembering all of your lies is impossible and it's an easy way to get caught out," says Aaron.
Their libido changes. Your partner's libido can change for a range of reasons so it may not be a sure sign of cheating but it can be a red flag according to Aaron. Aaron says: "Cheaters often have less sex at home because they are cheating, but on occasions, they may also have more sex at home, this is because they feel guilty and use this increase in sex to hide their cheating. You may also find that your partner will start to introduce new things into your sex life that weren't there before.".
They become negative towards you. Cheaters know that cheating is wrong and to them, it will feel good, this can cause tension and anxiety within themselves which they will need to justify. "To get rid of the tension they feel inside they will try to convince themselves that you are the problem and they will become critical of you out of nowhere. Maybe you haven't walked the dog that day, put the dishes away or read a book to your children before bedtime. A small problem like this can now feel like a big deal and if you experience this your partner could be cheating," warns Aaron.
