When a career-driven, self-proclaimed goddess meets a modern-day warrior with a fear of only sharks, sparks - or something - are bound to fly. Married At First Sight introduced us to bride Jacqui Burfoot on Sunday ,who, with her impressive résumé of yoga instructor, ex-cheerleader, and corporate professional, declared it's impossible to find someone on her level. Enter Ryan Donnelly, the multi-dimensional mortal who's ready to save you from cliffs, but won't touch a razor for his wedding day. Match made in heaven? Let's see.

Jacqui, who wants a 'male version' of herself (tall, successful, blonde—naturally), couldn't hide her disappointment when Ryan rocked up with dark hair and scruff. 'I'm a bit disappointed he's not blonde,' she admitted, crushing his heroic heart faster than you can say 'shave, mate'. Despite Ryan's strong start, boasting about his cliff-rescue capabilities and fearlessness (except for sharks—those are still a no-go), Jacqui was already ticking boxes and finding faults.

When a career-driven, self-proclaimed goddess meets a modern-day warrior with a fear of only sharks, sparks - or something - are bound to fly. Pictured: Jacqui Burfoot and Ryan Donnelly. Jacqui, who wants a 'male version' of herself (tall, successful, blonde—naturally), couldn't hide her disappointment when Ryan rocked up with dark hair and scruff. The man can change a tap and lift heavy things, but can he meet Jacqui's ever-so-slightly high expectations of a man who'll give up his jacket and book spontaneous trips to the Hunter Valley?.

Ryan's vows were… well, let's call them Pinterest-worthy. 'You've knocked me out of the park,' he gushed, seemingly hoping to ride this wave of mediocrity into wedded bliss. Jacqui, the connoisseur of compliments, wasn't buying it. 'It felt rehearsed, if I'm being honest,' she complained to producers, setting her own stage for an epic eye-roll. But Ryan wasn't the only one bringing rehearsed energy. Jacqui's vows read more like a corporate contract than a declaration of love.

'You've knocked me out of the park,' he gushed, seemingly hoping to ride this wave of mediocrity into wedded bliss. Requiring monthly flowers, spontaneous vacations, and the eventual acquisition of a Cocker Spaniel puppy, she laid out her terms with the precision of a seasoned negotiator. All of this while casually mentioning their inevitable death—lighthearted, right?. The pièce de résistance came when the newlyweds were supposed to float down the aisle, hand in hand.

Ryan, the supposed warrior, seemed to misplace his courage, leaving Jacqui to take his hand and lead the way herself. Because, of course, if you want a man who'll sweep you off your feet, sometimes you've got to drag him by the hand first. Married At First Sight continues Monday at 7.30pm on Channel Nine. But Ryan wasn't the only one bringing rehearsed energy. Jacqui's vows read more like a corporate contract than a declaration of love.