I’m heteroflexible – that doesn’t mean I’m straight and really good at stretching
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Scrolling through the sexuality options on the dating app, I searched for the term that best described me. At that time in my life, I considered myself to be bisexual. While I’d never dated a man, I did find them attractive and liked to kiss them. Though in general I liked women much better: not just as partners, but as people.
![[Koda: Heteroflexibility]](https://metro.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2024/11/SEI_230537442-6b50.jpg?quality=90&strip=all&w=646)
Still, being bi was a label I understood, so I thought it was the only term that could fit. And then I saw the app – Feeld’s – option to choose ‘heteroflexible’. Defined as someone who is predominantly heterosexual, but is sometimes sexually attracted to (or curious about exploring) members of the same sex, something inside me clicked.
![[Koda: Heteroflexibility]](https://metro.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2024/11/SEI_230537495-55e3.jpg?quality=90&strip=all&w=646)
This sexuality mirrored exactly how I felt and my experiences to date. I finally felt seen. Throughout school, I never considered myself to be anything other than straight. I had only ever dated girls. I grew up in Seattle – known for its progressive politics – but kids were still teased for being gay. I definitely participated in the teasing, and even if I did have attraction to the same sex, I repressed it so as not to appear weak or effeminate.
![[Koda: Heteroflexibility]](https://metro.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2024/11/SEI_230537500-44ef-e1732289895498.jpg?quality=90&strip=all&w=646)
But then, during my first two years of university, I became part of what one might call a very ‘incestual’ friend group where we, semi-regularly, experimented with each other sexually, and endured all of the drama that came with that. With thousands of members from all over the world, our vibrant LGBTQ+ WhatsApp channel is a hub for all the latest news and important issues that face the LGBTQ+ community.
