We need to liberate sex from shame and fear
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By being true to ourselves we can find greater enjoyment and a deeper connection. I have never been afraid of sex. Of course that has hurt me quite badly over all the years I’ve been having it, but I remain fairly fearless. I am not afraid to talk about it, nor am I afraid to have it. Lots of different kinds of it, with lots of different people.
Sometimes I wonder if it’s because there’s something in there, some sort of pathology that has numbed me to the terrifying realities of (some) of the sex I’ve had: a childhood trauma or me rebelling against the last vestiges of my now renounced Catholicism.
I’ve spent quite a lot of time and money trying to work out whether I’m defective and if that’s the reason why I feel rather shameless in my enjoyment of sex, but I just can’t seem to take any negative answer I find there seriously. The way I act sexually – that is to say “with abandon” and in a manner that is “rather slutty” – is something I find really quite fun about myself. Like how I’m a Sagittarius rising! A sort of quite-fab thing about me that has no real-world consequences whatsoever (a Sag rising would say that though…).
It probably seems hypocritical that I’m writing under a pseudonym, but after having spoken at great length with my editor about this, I believe that a certain level of privacy precludes feelings of shame that come from the eyes and mouths of others, when expressing how much you love and want to fuck. It is not the business of you people who I am, but it might be the business of you people how to enjoy sex more.
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